A lot of things have happened since the last time I wrote a post. There were good things of course. I managed to drive my mom's car within the estate for the first time. Haha Don't even think I need a P plate anymore. Have been thinking of what cake to get darling for his birthday. Recently darling also bought me two dresses, a blue and a white one and of course I'm going to wear one of them at his birthday. There are only like 25 confirmed guests so far though... wonder what's taking them so long to reply....

Recently I've also been having weird weird dreams.I woke up one morning after a weird dream and typed out the fragments of the dream that I remembered-

Chow. Running through flooded field. Falling down. Vomitting in the water. Rich kid. Dad call chicken. Don't want me to be like the animal. Cane. Girl. Computer. Lab Uncle david. Dad. Work.

That was like just mismatched info hahaha... but I also had dreams where I was tied with a red string to a plant and I had to get loose if not something bad would happen and I ran and tried to drag myself away but I knew I couldn't look back if not something bad would happen. .... Weird...

Recently, darling has also been very nice to me and very patient. But the past two days itself I thought I saw something in the way he treats me. He was rather... distant and nonchalent. His answers in sms and during chats were rather.... weird... A typical one would be...

Me: Your nonchalance is astounding! Haha... ya... sort of like you don't care le? =( ah wells hope I'm thinking too much...

J:I don't think I don't care...

Me: Yupp guess I'm looking too much into stuff.. it's ok..

J: Ok then dear


Is it me? I think I'm really thinking too much into things... is it PMS?? WHAT IS IT? I don't know... how come I don't feel loved... I somehow feel like he's going through the motion and all that when he's with me... Does he feel the same way? When he sends me home, it's more of like there is no interest to send me back anymore it's not something he does with any feeling he just does it because he treats it like a responsibility? I don't know... Am I really thinking too much? I don't know why I'm thinking like this... I really hope that I'm wrong...

Today went to darling's place and his dad was home but heyy it was cool. We had pizza for lunch haha... then we tried going to play LAN at Jurong safra but the place was overpacked with smelly boys URGH... we sat outside to watch the Ger Aus match for awhile then went to JP and then headed home... Currently sitting here typing and musing... I don't wanna think too much any more.... Mel DO SOMETHING!!!