Today, he went for camp... don't know if I'm being sensitive or if I forgot or something but I thought last time when I said goodbye in an sms he will send something back no matter what. Well, recently he's like a crush I used to have who used to not bother about me: when I send a good bye message he doesn't reply. Well he has the unlimited sms... sending me a reply that is definite that doesn't need a reply would be fine right? Or is there another way to look at it: that he's comfortable with me and feels that when I say bye it means bye? Or is he growing tired of it all? If it were to end it won't be him to end it. But men are clever when they want the girls to end a r/s for them... they make the girl see that they don't care anymore and the girl simply lets go.
I don't know what to think. Sometimes I feel like he really has no more feelings for me then he does things to make me feel that we are still in love. Is it that we are really still in love or that he no longer feels it but he is trying to salvage it? And if so what should I do? SOmetimes I can see him trying but sometimes I see him pulling away...
Is it true that when you have been hurt in a past r/s you tend to not want to give your everything into the subsequent r/s as well? Maybe thats why..... Also... men have their ego and they want to belong somewhere so if their friends do not publicly announce their r/s status and all that does it mean the guy has to follow? PJ said must see the guy's XIN "heart". I told her that in his last camp the guys in his bunk didn't call or text their gfs and all that everynight so he didn't call everynight. But I just realised that he did sms me at least once a day. I don't know thats what I mean by sometimes I feel maybe he doesn't like me anymore and then I think of some stuff he did and it shows that he does.
Anthony told me that guys looking out for chio bus are normal. Hell I know that too. I asked him if the guy is honest and tells his gal he wshes there were chio bus in his camp, is it a good thing and Anthony said yes. His words were that guys like to disturb but in the end he will stay true to you. Thats comforting to know =))
I don't want to be immature: to hanker over the guy and want to be by his side every minute. I don't want to suffocate the guy. From what I know I've not been suffocating him and have been doing an ok job la... but I don't really feel that way. I'm hiding the fact that I miss him and I'm hiding the 19 yr old me so that I can shoot to the 20 something me... growing up faster than I should. But I really don't mind. As long as all that I do will be worth it. I really don't mind.
~Hopefully, as the spirit grows each passing day, so will the love~
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